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Archive for the Dating Relationships Category

Uncomfortable Visiting Home with Pets?

Uncomfortable Visiting Home with Pets?

I’m uncomfortable visiting my girlfriend in her home because of her house pets.  I hate it when her cats rub up against my slacks or paw at them because they leave cat hair and snags.  Then, when I try to be friendly to her dog, it licks my hands leaving me feeling like I need to wash them. I hate this! What can I do besides not ever visit her in her home? This is a tough one because your friend probably doesn’t have a clue that you feel this way, and she would probably feel bad if she did.  People who have house pets consider them part of the family and can be every bit as emotionally attached to their pets as they are their human family members!  Pets can bring such solace, comfort and joy to their owners it’s only natural for their owners to love and cherish their dear pets.  Add to that, a pet will never criticize or judge them and is always happy to see them and its no wonder some people find their pets more enjoyable than their human counterparts! Just as pet owners can have very clean homes with well-behaved indoor pets, the opposite can be true.  Approach this from a practical point of view.  If you do go visit your friend be prepared to wear clothes you don’t mind getting a little pet hair on, or tuck your hand sanitizer in your purse.  Don’t feel that you have to interact with her pet.  Owners are usually very attuned to guests who don’t want to interact with their pets and will accommodate you by steering them clear of you.  If these methods don’t appeal to you and you just feel too uncomfortable, plan to meet your friend at the local coffee shop, and

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Military Fiancé Killed in Action?

Military Fiancé Killed in Action?

I was engaged to a military man who was killed in action 18 months ago and I’m trying to move forward with dating again.  What I’m finding in the dating scene is men who just want a sexual relationship or a one-night-stand but not a real relationship.  That’s not me and not what I want.  How do I deal with this and find men who want a real relationship? So sorry for your loss…getting back to dating has to be tough…but I think you know to not compromise your personal values in relationship.  If you are not in to casual sex, don’t go there and don’t waste your time on those man whores who will sleep with anyone and everyone and carry on affairs with several women at once. I guarantee that if they are willing to quickly bed you they are trailing several other women along as well.  Congrats to you for holding fast to your own values and honoring your self respect. How do you meet men who want a real relationship?  It becomes a numbers game.  To improve your chances at winning in love you need to be in the playing field.  Place yourself in positions where you will meet men.  Think outside the box for new and different places to meet men because if you’re not out and about playing the game, there’s no chance of winning.  Elevate your level of play by paying attention to your physical appearance and approach toward men.  Are those at the top of your game?  If so, head out with confidence and a winning attitude. (Geesh-I think my commentary was inspired by my working next to the radio sports guy!) Believe me when I say that there are men out there looking for the same thing you are, relationship.  How

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Too Attractive for Female Friends?

Too Attractive for Female Friends?

I’m a single woman in my 50’s that is often mistaken for much younger.  I work as an actress, have long blonde hair and keep myself up and in shape. When I attend singles functions I have women saying mean things to me and have a difficult time making friends.  Should I give up on making women friends? There has to be a reason that women you don’t know well and have just met are being mean to you. Yes, it could be that they are envious of your attractiveness, but I would venture to say that you give off a vibe (that you are not aware of), that makes them dislike you. You’ve heard that saying, you get what you give?  How are you approaching them?  Do you greet them warmly, smile and show interest in them and their lives?  Do you show a genuine interest in them or do you prance around at these events with an air of superiority and a “look how attractive I am compared to you” attitude? If you have no awareness of how you are perceived by the women at these events, get a female friend or acquaintance to attend with you for the sole purpose of critiquing how you act and the vibe you put off.  What you don’t see or know about yourself you can’t work to fix.  My guess is that if you place more emphasis on inner beauty versus outer beauty you will be headed in the direction of making women friends. Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~ How can you look to women for their inner beauty versus their outer attractiveness? What do you believe in, have passion for or hold dear in your heart? What inner beauty do you hold within?

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Wife Throws Mistress off Cliff

Wife Throws Mistress off Cliff

Yep, that’s exactly what a wife from Peru did to her husband’s mistress!  The mistress escaped serious injury and denied being sexually involved with the husband.  But wait!  There is a video!  In the video you can see her touching him in a way that, most women would agree, only a mistress would!   http://youtu.be/b7PNCOgcTe4 Oh, the mistress, that woman who dates married men in the hopes that they will leave their wives and families for her.  The woman who believes his lies about how he doesn’t like his wife and most certainly doesn’t have sex with her. Or does he? One wife whose marriage broke up over an affair found out that the reason her husband started taking Viagra was that he was trying to keep up in the bedroom with not only her, but two mistresses as well!  All at the same time!  Their marriage ended and he took off with one mistress leaving the other mistress behind.  I understand that the mistress who was left behind was more than pissed off at him.  A bit ironic.  She thought she was the only one he was cheating on his wife with! So, why would a woman choose to date only married men? Listen to the podcast from this weekends show to hear firsthand from a brave woman who opens up about how she has always been attracted to and dated married men.  Her reasons for dating married men might surprise you and you’ll want to hear what she had to say about finding out that she wasn’t his only mistress!  This podcast should come with a warning label that says: Ladies, be on the look-out for the little blue pill… Listen to The Joan Jerkovich Show podcast “Mistresses, Cheaters, Non-Judgmental  Friends” @ http://joanjerkovich.com/2013/10/07/mistresses-cheaters-non-judgemental-friends/

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Mistresses, Cheaters, Non-Judgemental Friends

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/10.5.13/10.5.13Podcast.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: Android | RSSPodcast Segments: Mistress Intrudes on Family Vacations The Mistress Part 1, @ 7:50 The Mistress Part 2, @ 25:45 Cheaters and Cell Phones @ 43:42 Supportive Friend @ 44:49 Stop Judging Friends @ 60:55 Brought to you by: Hospice of Salina Martinelli’s Little Italy Girls Scouts Dignity Care Home Protandim LifeVantage Bennington State Bank George Jerkovich Photography Circles of the Heartland Stiefel Theatre Smokey Hill Museum

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~ Geeky Guy Shy Around Girls?

Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~ Geeky Guy Shy Around Girls?

I’m a kind of computer geek and getting around people makes me uncomfortable unless they’re already my friends. Most of my friends are virtual friends from online gaming.  How do I make new friends and especially meet girls I can date? First, you need to get out more to new places that you don’t usually go to, and, you need to get involved in groups that interest you where you can meet new people.  Before you throw out a big “Duh” to my response, you might be surprised by the geeks I’ve heard from who lament not having any friends, or anyone to date, yet admit to spending all their time with their computer avatars role playing through life as their alter ego.  I know that you may like those characters to role play right on to your couch, especially one of those sexy cosplay girls, but, that just ain’t gonna happen! You need to role-play into real life.  Step away from your computer, or say goodbye to your online gamer friends, take off your headset and put down your video-game-controller, then go relate to some real people. When you do that, pay attention to how you look.  Don’t wear your dumpster diver T-shirt.  You know, the one with the tiny little holes that you think “no one can even see”…And wash your greasy hair ~ that is unless the group of friends you hope to meet hang at the local trading card shop playing “Magic, The Gathering” ~ then you’ll fit right in! It’s OK if meeting new people, and especially girls, are uncomfortable for you.  Remember when you were a newb at gaming?  You learned the rules of the game then played it until your skill level rose.  The rules are the same for conquering your social awkwardness. 

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Mistrust Boyfriend?

Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Mistrust Boyfriend?

My boyfriend of 2 years has a long history of dating, and sleeping with, many women.  I know that he cheated on his last girlfriend, but I cheated on my husband, so I have no room to judge.  I don’t trust him, I know he sometimes texts old girlfriends, but I also know he’s been faithful to me.  I’m afraid my distrust will drive him away. …and you may be right…failure to find the “trust” you need in this relationship may drive the two of you apart.  What you both have brought to your relationship is baggage, truckloads of it!  You both have a history of cheating, so it is reasonable for either of you to mistrust.  While I have been known to caution someone who’s thinking of entering into a relationship with a known cheater, as people are more apt to repeat past behavior, we do not live in a perfect world. If you are concerned about your mistrust driving him away (even though you do trust that he has been faithful) I’m guessing that he’s been warning you of this possibility…and if you want to keep your man you MUST pay heed!  That’s not to say that you need to turn a blind eye to his connections with old girlfriends.  I suggest you approach this issue with open, honest conversation that is voiced in a matter-of-fact, taking-care-of-business way.  Pay attention to your tone of voice.  Take the accusing, whining, nagging out of these conversations…leave that for your bitch sessions with girlfriends.  We women are emotional creatures and too much emotion makes our men crazy.  Save the crazy for the bedroom and you’ll have a win/win on your hands! Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~ Could some of your mistrust be coming from within and the fact that

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Boyfriend Won’t Accept Breakup?

Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Boyfriend Won’t Accept Breakup?

I’ve been trying to break up with my boyfriend, but he doesn’t seem to accept the fact that I’d like to remain a friend, but am not interested in being in a relationship anymore.  I feel bad about this because he’s kind of a loner, and I’m sort of the only person he’s close to, so I stay in touch.  How can I get him to understand I just want to be friends? Your question holds the answer to why he’s clueless about this.  If you want him to understand that you’re not a couple, you will need to go cold turkey on him.  Stop the phone calls, texts, Facebook messaging and all means of communication.  Your “staying in touch” may appear to him that you haven’t really broken up or there’s a chance of getting back to where you used to be as boyfriend/girlfriend. Some couples can pull off the “just friends” routine after a breakup but most cannot.  Being friends with a girl is especially hard for guys because…you’ve heard me say it many times before…guys are hard-wired to want to have sex.  If there is any hope of turning your relationship in to a friendship, it’s best to have no contact for, let’s say, six months, and then give it a try; but don’t be surprised if he broaches the subject of your being “friends with benefits”. Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~ What do you need to do to remain accountable to the~No Contact~rule for breaking up? If you felt overly responsible for the emotional well being of a boyfriend from a past relationship, how did you get over that feeling and move on? What do you need to do to not feel guilty over leaving him “alone”? Please SHARE this on Facebook and lend

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Turn Friendship into Romance?

Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Turn Friendship into Romance?

A girl I met at the gym has turned into my workout buddy.  I’d like to ask her out, but I’m not sure she see’s me as anything more than just a friend.  I’ve never dated much so don’t know how to approach her. This is one thing a lot of girls just don’t understand about guys…they think you just want to be their friend, when in reality, you guys just want to get in their pants.  (Don’t groan as you read this because you know I’m right on this one!)  What you need to do is find your male confidence and swagger.  Change the way you interact with her.  Send her “potential date” signals by flirting with her; compliment her, look her in the eye, keep the conversation focused on her, and find ways to casually touch her.  Keep things light and playful.  Observe other guys who seem to easily send out these types of signals to women and copy some of their moves until you find your own signature style. You’re going to have to buck it up and ask her out on a date.  When you do ask, use the word “date”.  Say something like, “Jenny, I’d really like to take you out on a date, how about dinner Saturday night?”  Let’s dissect this way of asking her.  First, when you use her name it will really get her attention. Second, when you use the word “date” you make it clear that you hope to be more than just friends.  Third, while most first dates should be brief, such as meeting for coffee (it gives you both a quick escape if needed), this is a girl you’re already friends with so plan something memorable.  Taking that first step is always the hardest because we all fear rejection. 

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Still Single at 42?

Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach~Still Single at 42?

I’m a 42-year-old male and had always expected to be married with children by now, but after several long-term relationships I’m still single.  I keep busy so I’m not lonely, just tired of being alone.  Any thoughts? There are 3 thoughts that I’d like to impart:  First, while you would love to be married with children, this may not happen for you.  Acceptance is key here.  Accepting that life hands us challenges that aren’t fair, and piss us off, and make us want to sit on our pity pot and whine all day, is the part of life and living that, simply said, “Sucks”!  Do whatever you need to find acceptance that this is your (current) lot in life.  Release your frustration in the gym or go smash some golf balls; then seek acceptance by going inward…dare I say meditation and yoga? Second, live your life for now.  Make it enriching, exciting and self-fulfilling.  Ponder the benefits of being single, such as, not having to answer to anyone else, not getting in trouble (like your married friends) for eyeing an attractive woman or spending money on yourself.  I guarantee that there are elements of your life your married friends envy! Finally, don’t give up on love.  Analyze your leisure activities to see how available you are making yourself to meeting women.  Let your family and friends know that you are still looking for love as they may think you are content with the single life.  If you haven’t been winning at love, change your game. Make meeting women and dating a priority project and approach it as you would a business venture.  You know the drill…just do it! Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~ Where can you go inwardly and outwardly to find acceptance? What is on your bucket

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