Empowering Talk Radio

Archive for the Family Relationships Category

Dropping Out of School-Who Drops Out, Consequences, Help for Parents; Illegal Unpaid Internships

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/10.25.14/10.25.14Podcast.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSPodcast Segments: Characteristics, Consequences of Dropping Out of School @ 0:00 Curfew After College @ 7:50 Caller Wants to Dropout @ 23:21 Dropouts, Help For Parents @ 42:11 Motivated 15 year old @ 44:58 Illegal Unpaid Internships @ 59:55 Brought to you by: Martinelli’s Little Italy Hospice of Salina Bennington State Bank Dignity Care Home Freddy’s Frozen Custard and Steakburgers Peaceful Body Wellness Retreat Sunflower Carpet One Preventative Medicine Center     The Joan Jerkovich Show   News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am CST   Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions   Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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Drug Addicted Dad?

Drug Addicted Dad?

I love my Dad, but my husband and I have had it with his drug addiction. We were letting him live with us to help him out. He’s been in and out of recovery. We were hoping he could make a go of it this time but he relapsed again, so we kicked him out. Now I can’t bring myself to take his calls or talk to him, I’m so mad at him. I worry about him because I don’t even know where he’s living. He could be on the streets for all I know. How can I be there for him while setting limits for myself and protecting my family? Setting limits is necessary when dealing with an addicted family member, so you needed to kick him out if he was disrupting your own family life. Don’t allow yourself to go down the path of feeling guilty for kicking him out. And, don’t feel guilty for not taking his calls for the time being. I know that sounds harsh and uncaring, but I’m sure your intention to distance from him is only temporary. If you set down rules for his living with you and he violated them, then the consequences for his poor choices are his to endure. Maybe this little piece of tough love from you and your family will help him get focused again on his recovery. I’m sure you realize that relapse is a part of addiction, so expect more relapses on his journey toward recovery. In trying to be there for him, start with deciding on your personal limits. Talk with your husband and make some decisions on what you can and can’t do to help your Dad. Set some hard limits on what you absolutely will not allow, such as, drugs in your home.

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Kids Saddened Over Estrangement From Grandparents?

Kids Saddened Over Estrangement From Grandparents?

When I married my wife she had two kids by two different fathers. She’d been a professional woman who made her own way but never married. She is feisty and will get in your face if you criticize her, and my mother has made it known she doesn’t like her. I’m proud that my wife has held her tongue with my mother. But, my mothers obvious dislike for my wife had me defending my wife to where we now haven’t seen each other for several years. My wife and I now have two of our own children together. I’ve adopted her oldest two. We’ve made a nice life for ourselves that doesn’t include my parents, and doesn’t include my wife’s parents also. Theirs is a similar story. I felt all was good until our two oldest kids started talking to us about how they miss their grandparents. They are in middle school and talked about how all their friends spend Christmas and holidays with their grandparents, but they never see theirs. They seemed sad about this and it has my wife and I rethinking our decision to cut ties with their grandparents, especially her parents, as they are the grandparents who helped my wife raise these two children when she was a single parent. We thought we were protecting our children from the fighting and negativity but are now rethinking that decision. You are wise to be rethinking your no-contact position. When you say that you and your wife have created a “nice life” for your children, I’m assuming you mean one that includes all the “nice” that money can buy such as nice cell phones and nice clothes. But, creating a nice life for children has to include attending to their emotional needs as well. Your children are getting

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No Show, No Call Workers; Interview Essentials; Older Job Applicant; Growing Business

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/9.20.14/9.20.14Podcast.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSPodcast Segments: Growing Essential Oils Business @ 0:00 Older, Back to Job Market @ 19:19 Positive Focus for Older Applicant @ 28:31 Interview Essentials @ 39:38 No-Show, No-Call Worker @ 45:02 Reasons Workers No-Show, No-Call @ 1:02:19 Brought to you by: Martinelli’s Little Italy Hospice of Salina Bennington State Bank Dignity Care Home Freddy’s Frozen Custard and Steakburgers Peaceful Body Wellness Retreat Sunflower Carpet One Preventative Medicine Center The Joan Jerkovich Show News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am CST Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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Surviving a Dysfunctional Family

Surviving a Dysfunctional Family

Growing up with an alcoholic or substance abusing parent can be chaotic and unpredictable. Rules and expectations can change on a daily basis. Children are to be seen but not heard. Any expression of your feelings is forbidden or ignored. And, there is absolutely NO talking about the elephant in the room…the parents’ addiction! This leaves children feeling insecure, frustrated and angry. Moving toward adulthood this can cause difficulties with relationships where honest emotional expression is key. Children of substance abusers are also at risk for developing their own problems with addictions. Growing up with a parent who is chronically mentally ill or disabled, sets up a situation where the family responsibilities fall to the older children. From a young age they may be called upon to care take their younger siblings, get food on the table, and attend to adult responsibilities. This often leaves them feeling inadequate and guilty, and those feelings can follow them in to adulthood. Growing up with the helicopter parent who is overly controlling and overly involved, can leave a child feeling resentful, inadequate and powerless. These parents try to control and dominate everything their children are involved with. As adults, children raised this way can have difficulty making their own decisions. Growing up with a parent who is verbally or physically or sexually abusive leaves the deepest scars. Verbal abuse can be very direct such as criticism or belittling, or it can be more subtle, such as put-downs disguised as humor. Physical abuse can be disguised as “discipline” but creates an environment of fear, terror and anger. Children who grow up in an environment of verbal and physical abuse have difficulties developing feelings of trust and safety as adults. Growing up with sexual abuse can carry feelings of self-loathing, shame and worthlessness. Children with

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Husband Hangs with Questionable Characters?

Husband Hangs with Questionable Characters?

My husband has some questionable friends and family members he hangs out with. Certain people have been known to not be faithful to their wives or significant others, not to mention they are not known to have been law abiding citizens. My husband is a respectable, kind, law abiding, trustworthy person. I trust him 100% but when he is with these certain characters I constantly worry if they are going to talk him into things he normally wouldn’t do. I also worry that he will be with them when they are acting like fools. I have spoken to my husband about these worries and he tells me that he is not a child and he can hold his own and can take care of himself. I obviously can’t tell him to not hang out with these people because some are family and he isn’t my child, so how do I alleviate my worries when he is out? I ran your question past my husband who is a shrink and he had a very different take on an answer. He focused on your anxiety (duh, that’s his specialty) and ways to calm your fears when your husband is out. Sorry, but I can’t remember what he said to tell you because I kinda tuned him out, because I had a different take on your question. And besides, he can get his own damn blog spot…this is mine!! My take on your question falls right in line with your worries. I would worry too. What the hell is your husband doing hanging out with criminals? Adulterers and cheaters I take a softer stance with, even though lying in relationships causes lasting damage, and I’m sure you don’t want that in your marriage. We’ve all heard the saying “birds of a feather flock

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Bratty Rich Kids; Overspending; Weight Gain After Loss; Life After Stroke; New Hope for Chronic Pain

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/9.13.14/9.13.14Podcast.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSPodcast Segments: Weight Gain after losing Mother and Friend @ 0:00 Inspiring Life After Stroke @ 11:48 Living with Chronic Pain @ 23:28 New Hope for Chronic Pain @ 42:48 Overspending @ 45:08 Bratty Rich Kids @ 1:01:26 Brought to you by: Martinelli’s Little Italy Hospice of Salina Bennington State Bank Dignity Care Home Freddy’s Frozen Custard and Steakburgers Peaceful Body Wellness Retreat Sunflower Carpet One Preventative Medicine Center The Joan Jerkovich Show News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am CST Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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Unappreciative Family Members?

Unappreciative Family Members?

I’ve always thought that family should stick together and help each other out, but I’m tired of feeling unappreciated. I’m a single mom raising my son and when my nephew lost his job I let him and his girlfriend move in with me. While I was working and going to school, they were supposed to both be looking for jobs, but I think they spent more time just laying around. They were getting food stamps, but never shared any groceries with me or my son and never helped out around the house. I had been asking them to leave, but things got really nasty and almost came to blows when I told them to clean the kitchen while I was at work. When I came home and it wasn’t done, their excuse was that it wasn’t their mess. I felt they should at least help me out since they’d been living for free with me for so long and neither of them was working. The girlfriend really got in my face so I packed up their stuff, left it on the front porch and locked them out. Other people in the family are telling me I should have known these two would act like this, and that I should have never left them in my house in the first place. I’ve always thought family should help each other out, but now I’m wondering if it was worth it? I know, you hate to stop being that generous person that you are just because of this one bad egg in the family, but let’s talk about how you can balance your generosity with setting personal boundaries. And, by the way, from what you wrote I think you were doing a pretty darn good job of setting expectations and boundaries with these

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Mom-zilla, Mother of the Bride

Mom-zilla, Mother of the Bride

My mother is making me so angry because she is trying to make my wedding her own. I’ve told her that my fiancé and I are wanting to make the plans ourselves. We’re both established professionals and are paying for the wedding since I’ve been married before. With the help of a wedding planner, things are coming together nicely. Our biggest problem has become that my mother keeps trying to meddle and stick her nose in to our plans when she has been clearly asked to let us do this ourselves. She even went so far as to call my wedding planner behind my back, telling her that I gave her permission to call and release to her the guest list. When I heard this from the wedding planner I was also told that my mother instructed the wedding planner to hand out the wedding favors she made for the guests. This was not in our plans at all. I got so mad at my mom I confronted her. We were both angry, each of us trying to hold our own ground, and she made the comment that she may not come to my wedding. Even though I know she will be there, her controlling personality won’t let her stay away, I’m so fed up with her right now I’m avoiding talking to her. We’re usually really close and this makes me feel bad. It’s a stress I don’t need before our happy day, so how can I make this less stressful for all of us? You have a real mom-zilla on your hands. I agree with you. Your mom needs to butt out. This is your wedding and not hers, and especially when she is not paying for the festivities, the planning needs to be left to you and

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Robin Williams Suicide Risk Factors; New Treatments for Depression; Abusive, Dysfunctional Parents

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/8.23.14/8.23.14Podcast.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSPodcast Segments: New Treatments for Depression @ 0:00 Depressed After Job Loss @ 7:18 Blues Producer’s Celebrity Clients @ 22:31 Robin Williams 5 Risk Factors @ 42:52 Abusive Dysfunctional Parents @ 45:07 International Job Offer @ 51:36 Success Despite Adversity-A Must Listen! @ 1:06:58 Surviving A Dysfunctional Family @ 1:27:21 Brought to you by: Martinelli’s Little Italy Hospice of Salina Bennington State Bank Dignity Care Home Freddy’s Frozen Custard and Steakburgers Peaceful Body Wellness Retreat Sunflower Carpet One Preventative Medicine Center     The Joan Jerkovich Show   News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am CST   Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions   Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!  

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