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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach: Sister Dying, Custody of Children?

Joan Jerkovich "Your" Life Coach: Sister Dying, Custody of Children?

My sister is experiencing severe health problems and wants me to take custody of her children if she dies instead of her abusive ex-husband. How do I handle the legal and family drama that comes with this situation? There are so many factors at play in your tragic family situation, it’s no wonder you question how you’re going to handle it all.  Look to maximize your own personal strengths during this trying time.  Take care of yourself.  Tend to your own emotional needs.  Nurture your spirit.  Your sister certainly believes in you, otherwise she wouldn’t want to leave her children with you to raise when she’s gone.  Whatever happens with custody of the children, you can certainly promise your sister you will always be there to help mother the children and keep her memory alive.  What an honor she is bestowing on you.  You must be (you are!) an amazing person! Unleash your Personal Power! Ask yourself these Life Coaching questions: What can you do each day to help soothe your sadness over your sister? Can you accept that showing and experiencing your sadness is natural and healing? Is your sister well enough to help you make a plan for the children? Can you both accept that you will do your best to follow the plan? If legal custody does not fall to you, what can you do to still be there for the children? How have you successfully dealt with things in your life that did not go as planned? What personal strengths can you draw on to “accept the things you cannot change”? What can you do to remind yourself that, regardless of what happens, you “have done the best you could”? Join the Conversation:  How would you handle a similar situation? Follow Joan’s Life Coaching questions Daily

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Joan Jerkovich “Your” Life Coach: Drug Addicted Dad?

Joan Jerkovich "Your" Life Coach: Drug Addicted Dad?

I love my Dad, but my husband and I have had it with his drug addiction.  We were letting him live with us to help him out. He relapsed again, so we kicked him out.  Now I can’t bring myself to take his calls or talk to him.  How can I be there for him while setting limits for myself? Setting limits is necessary when dealing with an addicted family member, so you needed to kick him out if he was disrupting your own family life.  Don’t allow yourself to go down the path of feeling guilty over that one, nor over not taking his calls for the time being.  You sound angry, and rightfully so, if his pattern has been to relapse “again”.  That said, I’m sure you realize that relapse is a part of addiction, so expect more relapses on his journey toward recovery.  In trying to be there for him, start with deciding on your personal limits.  Make your own health and well being your number one priority.  This is tough stuff you’ve been dealt! Unleash your Personal Power! Ask yourself these Life Coaching questions: What boundaries do you need to set in your relationship with your Dad? What time frame do you set for yourself to start implementing these boundaries? What can you do to support him that will not leave you feeling “put-out”? What does he do that makes you the angriest? How can you minimize your involvement in that part of his life? What do you have to do to take care of yourself in this situation? Do you have an addicted family member, and what have you done to cope? Follow Joan’s Life Coaching questions Daily at www.joanjerkovich.com Joan Jerkovich is a Board Certified Life Coach who takes your questions on Relationships, Health,

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