Empowering Talk Radio

Archive for the Life Coaching Category

How To “Think Outside The Box”; Seeking A Career In TV; When Thinking Outside The Box Doesn’t Work

http://joanjerkovich.com/podcasts/8.20.16/8.20.16.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: iTunes | Android | RSSPodcast Segments: How To “Think Outside The Box @ 0:00 Seeking A Legacy Through TV @ 4:46 Seeking A Career In TV @ 24:18 When Thinking Outside The Box Doesn’t Work @ 43:09 Brought to you by: Martinelli’s Little Italy Dignity Care Home Freddy’s Frozen Custard and Steakburgers Sunflower Carpet One Preventative Medicine Center Sunflower Bank The Joan Jerkovich Show News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am & Sundays @ 9pm CST Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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In And Out Of Relationship With Ex?

In And Out Of Relationship With Ex?

My ex husband and I have tried to make our relationship work, moving in and out with each other about four times since our divorce 15 years ago. We finally bought a condo last year together, one year ago, and we still fight. Our fights are now upsetting our 8-year-old granddaughter. It’s such a long story, and there are a lot more details, but I would really appreciate help because I’m wanting to give up again to save my kids broken hearts. I read and re-read your question, as I know this is serious business for you. Especially since I can see how hard you have fought to make your relationship with your Ex work! Now, you seem to be asking for an opinion on whether or not you should move out of the condo you share with your Ex, since your fighting is affecting your granddaughter. In my humble opinion, stated in one word, that word is “Yes”. …And I will take my opinion one step further and tell you that I feel you should not only move out, but you should begin to build a life for yourself that no longer involves trying to live with your Ex. You and your Ex can still be friendly. You can be social companions who go places together. You can even attend family events together. But, living together seems to set both of you up for fight mode. Work toward carving out a new type of relationship with your Ex. One that involves spending only a tolerable amount of time together, where you can both maintain civility. After all these years of trying to get along, I’m guessing you both know what triggers your fights. Avoid those situations. If you find yourselves starting to bicker and fight, go your separate ways.

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Is This Angry Boyfriend Dangerous?

Is This Angry Boyfriend Dangerous?

I’ve been dating a guy for about 2 months now, but my best friend hates him. I think he’s cute and funny. He was interested in her at first but she told him “no”. She warned me to stay away from him because of his past. He’s been through rehab recently but keeps telling me that he’s changed. The only bad thing about him is that sometimes he can have a bit of a temper, so I’ve learned some of the things that make him angry and don’t do those things. Yesterday my friend and I got into a bad argument. She said that I’m putting up with too much of his anger and not standing up for myself. “He can just be sensitive since being in rehab and he promises he will never hurt me”, I told her. Since our argument my friend has been checking up on me every day, like I’m a little kid. How can I tell her to let me handle my relationship on my own and still stay friends with her? Do you think your friend might be trying to help you and keep you safe from a potentially abusive man? When I have had a friend say or do something that bothered me, I always try to look at their intent, or rationale, for getting in my business. If I know their heart is in the right place, and that they aren’t coming from a place of meanness or cattiness, I can’t hold their actions against them. We all say and do things that upset others at times. Consider this when you feel upset with your friend for trying to warn you about this man. I side with your friend in trying to warn you that this man who’s so “cute and funny”

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3 Methods For Coping With Things You Resent, But Cannot Change

3 Methods For Coping With Things You Resent, But Cannot Change

I’m so different from my brother. I’ve always been the one who believed in working hard to take care of myself and my family, but my brother comes around mooching off others, especially Mom and Dad, every chance he gets. He works just enough to barely get by. I’ve tried talking to our parents about how they’re not really helping him when they listen to his hard luck stories and hand over cash or groceries or loan him their car because his is broken down. How do I deal with the resentment I feel toward him and also toward my parents for giving in to him? Any situation where you have no choice but to accept the behavior of others, especially when their behavior does not align with your personal values, is incredibly vexing. You value hard work and value making your own way. Your brother doesn’t seem to have a problem accepting help from others. In his own mind, he probably doesn’t see himself as a mooch. Your parents may be giving in where you think tough love is in order. Such is the fodder of life challenges that make us grow in character. Every year that goes by, I realize more and more that I have no, nada, zero control over the actions of others. Thankfully, each year that goes by, I learn better ways of coping with resentments of the type you mentioned, and here are my TOP 3 METHODS FOR COPING: First, realize that you cannot control anyone else, you can only control yourself. To help you do this, make a list of what you can do to set up your own personal boundaries with regards to this situation and implement your top three. Keep them respectful and considerate, but use these as your personal guidelines

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How Abusive Dysfunctional Parents Affect Their Children For Life

How Abusive Dysfunctional Parents Affect Their Children For Life

Parents who have substance abuse problems, mental health issues, or are verbally, physically, or sexually abusive affect their children for life. For information on how children are affected when abusive, dysfunctional parents raise them, listen to: “The Joan Jerkovich Show” podcast: Abusive Dysfunctional Parents This weekend on “The Joan Jerkovich Show”, my caller talks about FORGIVING HER PARENTS FOR CHILDHOOD ABUSE. She has forgiven her Father for his abuse, but she’s struggling to forgive her mother for not protecting her. Listen as “Your Life Coach” brings you “Empowering Talk Radio”! The Joan Jerkovich Show News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am & Sundays @ 9pm CST Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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Wife Struggles With Husbands Addiction?

Wife Struggles With Husbands Addiction?

My husband has recently gotten his addiction to alcohol and pills under control. He’s following his recovery program but I feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him. He has all this support but I need support too. Any help? You do need support, and you deserve support. When you are in a relationship with an addict your life can feel like it’s not your own. An addiction can pervade every area of your life and your relationship. Just because your husband is newly sober or in recovery, all the problems his addiction created don’t magically go away. Darn. Wish they did? While I’m sure you’re happy that he has started down the road to recovery, do you feel like you’re expected to throw up a resounding cheer of praise while showering him with an “atta boy” or “good for you”, even though you resent that he took you down the road of addiction to begin with? Do you harbor resentment over what his addiction did to your relationship and family? Has he come around to being a true partner now that the drugs and alcohol are under control, or are you still the one holding things together? Has his recovery taken away all of his character flaws, such as lying? One opinion I have about addicts is that when you live with an addict, you live a life of lies. Lying about their drug use is part and parcel to their denial of how bad their addiction is. They lie to you and they lie to themselves. This is tough stuff. For help, cultivate your own support systems. Find a support group, supportive friends, counselor or pastor who will help you through this new way of sober living. Take care of your needs while you support your husband with

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Need Confidence With Dating?

Need Confidence With Dating?

I’m a kind of computer geek and getting around people makes me uncomfortable unless they’re already my friends. Most of my friends are virtual friends from online gaming. How do I make new friends and especially meet girls I can date? First, you need to get out more to new places that you don’t usually go to, and, you need to get involved in groups that interest you where you can meet new people! Before you throw out a big “Duh” to my response, you might be surprised by the geeks I’ve heard from who lament not having any friends, or anyone to date. Yet, they admit to spending all their time with their computer avatars role playing through life as their alter ego. I know that you may like those characters to role play right on to your couch, especially one of those sexy cosplay girls, but, that just ain’t gonna happen! You need to role-play into real life! Step away from your computer, or say goodbye to your online gamer friends. Take off your headset and put down your video-game-controller, then go relate to some real people. When you do that, pay attention to how you look. Don’t wear your dumpster diver T-shirt. You know, the one with the tiny little holes that YOU THINK “no one can even see”…and wash your greasy hair…that is unless the group of friends you hope to meet hang at the local trading card shop playing “Magic, The Gathering”…then you’ll fit right in! It’s OK if meeting new people, and especially girls, are uncomfortable for you. Remember when you were a newb at gaming? You learned the rules of the game then played it until your skill level rose. The rules are the same for conquering your social awkwardness. Learn the rules then

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Who Pays for Dinner?

Who Pays for Dinner?

It was a casual invitation to dinner but she wanted more. She wanted to at least feel that she was being courted, but when the check arrived the dance of “who’s going to pay for dinner” ensued. Being a progressive young career woman, Lauren offered to split the check. Her dinner date happily agreed. There have been more dinner dates over the past month with the all-too-familiar dance of “who’s going to pay”? Sometimes they split the check; at other times they take turns paying. When I asked Lauren if her girlfriends help pay for their dates, she explained how they all seem to approach this dilemma differently. Some expect the guy to pay for all the first dates until they are officially a couple. Others, like her, don’t have problems taking turns paying. What do you think? Who do you think should pay for dates? DATING is the topic for “The Joan Jerkovich Show” this weekend. Listen for discussion on “Signs You Have Chemistry”, and “Why Chemistry Is Important To Your Relationship”, and for a discussion on whether or not you should “Continue Dating When There’s NO Chemistry”. Empowering Talk Radio From Your Life Coach! The Joan Jerkovich Show News Radio 1150 KSAL with Live-streaming Saturdays @ 6am & Sundays @ 9pm CST Click HERE to send Joan your Life Coaching questions Join the conversation and post your respectful comments anonymously. We learn from each other!

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Feeling STUCK In 2-Year Relationship?

Feeling STUCK In 2-Year Relationship?

I’ve been dating a guy for 2 years and we tried breaking up for 2 weeks but now we’re back together again. Part of the reason we got back together is because we’re part of a group of friends who hang together all the time. Even if I break up with him, I’m going to see him when we hang out with friends. I’m happier when I’m broken up but he pushed me to give our relationship another try so we’re back together. I’m 75% sure I should end my two-year relationship. Will I ever be 100% sure? My answer to this question in one word is “No”. We are never 100% sure of any decision we make. With any decision that you make, that is difficult for you, take the time to process that decision using the methods that have worked well for you in the past. For some of us, it can be making out a list of pros and cons. For others, we need to discuss the decision with a friend to “bounce” it off of. Do you have a trusted friend in your group that you can discuss this with? It is more complicated breaking up since you’re all friends and I’m guessing that neither of you wants to leave your friend group? Your friends can help you navigate that change which will undoubtedly make all of you uncomfortable for a while. Be prepared to grit your teeth through the discomfort as in time it will pass. From what you write, I think you’re on the path to ending your 2-year relationship. Being “happier” when you’re broken up and being “pushed” in to giving it another try are telling statements… …Whatever your decision, spend some time with it. That way, once it is made you can

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He Saves-She Spends, Marital Money Issues?

He Saves-She Spends, Marital Money Issues?

The biggest arguments my husband and I have are over spending. I like to spend and he likes to save. I grew up in a family where my Dad spoiled me and I got everything I ever wanted. Sometimes I wish this were not the case because I know this has set me up for the number one stress my marriage of 27 years has had. Will this bickering over spending ever get resolved? Maybe before we hit our 50th anniversary? You may think you’re asking a question, but I think you’re telling all of us a beautiful love story! I’m sure you know the answer to your own question, which is to say that “no” you will never stop bickering with your husband over money. After 27 years of relating to each other in this way, neither of you are going to change. One marriage research project I read found that every long-term marriage has that thing (or those things) that they bicker about until “death do us part”. The issue never gets resolved (a key point to take note of…) and couples are good to not expect it to. Yet, over time, they find their own way of staying connected in spite of their differences. Ahhh…feel the love? I do! Embrace your Personal Power with Life Coaching~ • Has the way that the two of you bicker about money changed much in the past 20 years? • If not, why would you want to change things now? • If the bickering has escalated, are there other stresses in your marriage besides money? • What is your pattern for coming back together after disagreements? • How can you shorten the time you spend cussing and discussing, and get down to the business of reconnecting? Do you fight over money

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